We are all human

2 Corinthians 2:1–8 (NIV): So I made up my mind that I would not make another painful visit to you. 2 For if I grieve you, who is left to make me glad but you whom I have grieved? 3 I wrote as I did, so that when I came I would not be distressed by those who should have made me rejoice. I had confidence in all of you, that you would all share my joy. 4 For I wrote you out of great distress and anguish of heart and with many tears, not to grieve you but to let you know the depth of my love for you.
5 If anyone has caused grief, he has not so much grieved me as he has grieved all of you to some extent—not to put it too severely. 6 The punishment inflicted on him by the majority is sufficient. 7 Now instead, you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. 8 I urge you, therefore, to reaffirm your love for him.

Hippocrates (ca. 460–375 bc) brought medicine out of the realm of the superstitious and into the light of testing and observation. But he didn’t lose sight of the patient’s humanity. “It is far more important to know what person the disease has,” he said, “than what disease the person has.”

The apostle Paul cared for a church with multiple problems, yet he saw the humanity of each member—including a man who’d committed a sin “that even pagans do not tolerate” (1 Corinthians 5:1). Paul dealt strongly with the “disease,” and the man repented. (Tim Gustafson, Our Daily Bread 15 December 2025)

The quote from Hippocrates is interesting because we always tend to look at the disease and illness, and less the person. Not so much what person the disease had. There is the humanity behind the illness that we sometimes overlook or forget. It’s the same with sin and bad behaviour. We want to get rid of the sin, but we must save the person so we don’t end up throwing away the bath water together with the baby.

Practically, what this means is that in dealing with sin or bad behaviour, we forgive the person and reconcile with him or her once he or she repents. We accept them back into the fold, into the fellowship. Life goes on thereafter. No need to pick on the past or recall the past misdeeds or sins. If God wants to dial back time, there will be much for we ourselves to grieve over.

Good practice also dictates that in dealing with issues whether in church, at work or in the family, always remember the person behind the issue. For example, we save long term costs when we retrench someone but behind him are his wife and children depending on his paycheck to pay the bills and build their future. Or in a disciplinary inquiry, we shouldn’t go to extreme lengths just to secure a win unless we know for sure that what was done was really irresponsible and totally reckless. It was unprecedented that the Federal Court just a few days ago imposed a “cooling period” and requested the prosecution to reevaluate their “strategy” in Syed Saddiq’s case.

Have a good week ahead everyone! Everyone we see or meet may just be “someone else” in our eyes, but behind them are many moments, struggles and even aspirations of more. Not that we need to be entangled in everyone’s lives but be kind and forgiving and compassionate as everyone needs to put food on the table and pay bills.

Thanking God

https://odb.org/2025/12/12/cultivating-gratitude

Psalm 9:1–4 (NIV): 1 I will give thanks to you, LORD, with all my heart;
I will tell of all your wonderful deeds.
2 I will be glad and rejoice in you;
I will sing the praises of your name, O Most High. 3 My enemies turn back; they stumble and perish before you. 4 For you have upheld my right and my cause, sitting enthroned as the righteous judge.

“Dad, can you get me some water?” my youngest daughter asked. “Sure,” I said, bringing her a full cup. She took it wordlessly. Then my oldest daughter made the same request. She didn’t respond either after I got her some water. Annoyed, I blurted out, “Is anyone going to say, ‘Thank you’? Why is that so hard?”

Sometimes there’s nothing like parental frustration to open the door for God to work. Immediately I felt the gentle nudge of the Holy Spirit: Yes, Adam, why is it so hard to say, “Thank you”? Busted. Turns out a lack of gratitude isn’t just my kids’ problem; it’s mine too. (Adam R. Holtz, Our Daily Bread 12th December 2025)

Yesterday we just spoke about being kind and generous as a reflection of our thankfulness to God for His blessings upon our lives. Click on the link below if you had missed that devotional write-up: https://ronnielim.com/2025/12/11/kindness-and-generosity/

Today the topic is on the same theme except that it concerns us thanking God and Jesus for His goodness and blessings upon our lives. Specifically, verbally confessing with our lips our thankfulness and appreciation. Just like we are happy and glad that people acknowledge us by thanking us, the Lord is also likewise happy and glad when we do so.

Although He knows we are thankful and grateful, we must nevertheless thank Him verbally in words. It’s not a difficult thing to do. We hust add thanksgiving into our prayer routine amd praise the Lord every time we see and experience a good and positive outcome. Thank the Lord when our boss praises us for closing a deal because it was the Lord who enabled us to do so. Sometimes we see everything just goes to plan and we know it was the Lord aligning all the bricks for us. Trust in the Lord and He will make our paths straight! Thank the Lord. As the Psalmists say, never cease thanking and praising God for He is our deliverer and the protector of our faith, He is our stronghold and our salvation!

Have a good weekend ahead! Remember to physically attend church, to congregate and worship the Lord together with and amongst His people! Praise the Lord as we thank Him for His goodness, mercy and grace in our lives! Amen!

Kindness and generosity

https://odb.org/2025/12/11/the-shoes-off-his-feet

Colossians 3:12–17 (NIV): 12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. 16 Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. 17 And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

An older man jogging down a street in New York City stopped in his tracks when he noticed a pair of battered sneakers placed near a homeless man’s sign requesting help. When the jogger learned that the two men wore a similar size, he gave the younger, homeless man the shoes (and socks!) off his feet and walked home barefoot. But not before explaining, “I’ve been blessed my whole life. God has been very good to me, so I feel like I should bless you too.” (Alyson Kieda, Our Daily Bread 11th December 2025)

From giving away money to the things we own, it is showing kindness to another that points to Jesus. If we are well-off, giving away our pair of shoes could well mean an excuse to buy the latest one in the market! I digress. The truth is parting with things is not as easy as it looks. But if motivated by our gratefulness to and love for Christ, we could do much more. Ultimately however it is not our duty to help every poor and homeless person we see. As Jesus once said, the poor you will always have with you but you will not always have Him when the disciples criticised Mary (sister of Martha) for breaking her very expensive bottle of perfume (which she kept for her marriage) to wash Jesus’s feet using her hair (see John 12:3). What Mary did was special and significant as she was unknowingly preparing Jesus for burial (for He would soon be crucified for our sins) but the point made by Jesus was nevertheless that the poor will always be there in our midst.

Be that as it may that we will not be able to abolish poverty (it is the government’s role in making structural reforms as evidenced by China’s success in alleviating millions out of poverty), we should be kind when confronted with the poor or the needy or the oppressed. That kindness could be motivated by our thankfulness to God for blessing us or it could be because of the generosity already ingrained in us due to Jesus residing in our hearts.

Whatever may be our motivation, just be kind and generous to those around us, especially the poor and disadvantaged – the widows, orphans and the foreigner, whenever we can. Ultimately our act of kindness and generosity will point to Jesus as we are His brothers and sisters in Christ in the family and kingdom of God! Anything that we may do that will give glory to God, do it without hesitation! Amen!

Trust in the Lord

Proverbs 3:1-8 NIV– 3 My son, do not forget my teaching, but keep my commands in your heart, 2 for they will prolong your life many years and bring you peace and prosperity. 3 Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. 4 Then you will win favour and a good name in the sight of God and man. 5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. 7 Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and shun evil. 8 This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones. 9 Honour the Lord with your wealth, with the firstfruits of all your crops; 10 then your barns will be filled to overflowing, and your vats will brim over with new wine. 11 My son, do not despise the Lord’s discipline, and do not resent his rebuke 12 because the Lord disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.

Corey Brooks—“The Rooftop Pastor”—spent 343 days living on the rooftop of his church on Chicago’s south side to inspire community transformation. Online, Brooks posted a “shout-out” to his elementary school teacher Joe Stokes, who taught him four unforgettable lessons: the power of perseverance, the importance of integrity, the value of community engagement, and the impact of education.

By embracing Solomon’s wisdom in Proverbs 3, we likewise can strive to live in ways that have community impact. Solomon taught four lessons: “Trust in the Lord” (v. 5); “fear the Lord and shun evil” (v. 7); “honor the Lord with your wealth” (v. 9); “do not despise the Lord’s discipline” (v. 11). Such wisdom compels us to be God-focused, but there are people touching dimensions to our faith too. (Arthur Jackson, Our Daily Bread, 10th December 2025)

Wherever we are and at what station in life, we must always remember the LORD in all that we do. In Solomon’s words, “do not forget my teachings but keep my commands in your heart” (Proverbs 3:1). Whether we are a young man or woman or we are already in our old age, the principle remains. We keep His commands (His Word) in our hearts.

Keeping His commands may be broken down into many parts but in Proverbs 3, Solomon summarised it down to 4 main principles: (1) trust in the LORD, (2) fear the LORD and shun evil, (3) honour God with our money, and (4) do not rebel against His discipline. The results are that we will have a long life, have peace and prosperity and we will win favour and a good name in the sight of God and man. In other words, we will live good and honourable lives on earth. And since we are also sons and daughters of God through the redemptive blood of Christ on Calvary, we are assured of our place and treasures in eternity at the new heaven and new earth. In other words, we will live comfortably here on earth and thereafter.

As part of the living, we will no doubt still face challenges and rigours that life itself brings. The tears and joys, the heartbreaks, the health challenges as we age after years of neglect. But our eyes remain focused on Christ and our hearts still trust in the LORD. As Paul points out, “we know that God works all things together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose” (Romans 8:28). “He makes all things beautiful in His time”, Solomon in all his wisdom says in Ecclesiastes 3:11.

Ultimately, trust in the Lord with all our heart and lean not on our understanding and He will make our paths straight.

Being the church

https://odb.org/2025/12/09/being-the-church

Acts 2:36–47 (NIV): 36 “Therefore let all Israel be assured of this: God has made this Jesus, whom you crucified, both Lord and Messiah.”
37 When the people heard this, they were cut to the heart and said to Peter and the other apostles, “Brothers, what shall we do?”
38 Peter replied, “Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. 39 The promise is for you and your children and for all who are far off—for all whom the Lord our God will call.”
40 With many other words he warned them; and he pleaded with them, “Save yourselves from this corrupt generation.” 41 Those who accepted his message were baptized, and about three thousand were added to their number that day.
42 They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. 43 Everyone was filled with awe at the many wonders and signs performed by the apostles. 44 All the believers were together and had everything in common. 45 They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need. 46 Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, 47 praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.

On a sunny afternoon, I drew with sidewalk chalk with the Sudanese family next door. We could hear singing coming from the house next to theirs, where a small group holds worship services. The young mom I was talking with was curious about what was going on, so she and I walked over and listened in. They invited us to gather with them. A young man, standing in a tank filled with water for baptism, spoke about receiving forgiveness for his sins and committing himself to follow Jesus. This was a unique opportunity for us to hear a testimony of salvation in the yard right next door. This group was being the church in our neighborhood. (Anne Cetas, Our Daily Bread, 9th December 2025)

I always believed that we bring the Kingdom of God to wherever we are because as believers, God is with us and within us. In other words, we don’t only represent but we are the Kingdom of God with its full power and glory accessible through us. That’s why we can pray or as some circles say, command healing in the name of Jesus Christ, our Lord. We embody the Kingdom of God.

But being church takes that reality one step further as “being church” means undertaking church activities. We know that when two or three are gathered in His name, He and His presence is with us (Matthew 18:20). Thus we could gather as a house fellowship to study the bible, pray and worship. Or we could be a house church, where the Word is preached, the Holy Communion is partaken and like in today’s ODB life story, baptism is conducted. One distinct advantage of a house church is that we are right there deep within the community and if we have a potluck, more may be attracted to join in. A different set of dynamics is at play when church is in a home compared to a formal setting in a building. Nevertheless, we must always be reminded that our faith cannot be practised in isolation.

Perhaps we could open our home to our cell group and have a house fellowship? Or we allow the church to use our home as an outreach to our community, where Christ is preached, His crucifixion and His resurrection. Our home could well be the avenue for the manifestation of the power and glory of God! A place where the Holy Spirit will reign with His healing miracles, signs and wonders. This Christmas season, we could consider inviting the carollers to come by and open our home to our neighbours for a time of feasting and fellowship or we could just have a Christmas party with our church members and neighbours.

Hospitable generosity and gleaning

https://odb.org/2025/12/08/hospitable-generosity

Deuteronomy 24:17–22 (NIV): 17 Do not deprive the foreigner or the fatherless of justice, or take the cloak of the widow as a pledge. 18 Remember that you were slaves in Egypt and the LORD your God redeemed you from there. That is why I command you to do this. 19 When you are harvesting in your field and you overlook a sheaf, do not go back to get it. Leave it for the foreigner, the fatherless and the widow, so that the LORD your God may bless you in all the work of your hands. 20 When you beat the olives from your trees, do not go over the branches a second time. Leave what remains for the foreigner, the fatherless and the widow. 21 When you harvest the grapes in your vineyard, do not go over the vines again. Leave what remains for the foreigner, the fatherless and the widow. 22 Remember that you were slaves in Egypt. That is why I command you to do this.

A few years ago, our church hosted refugees fleeing their country because of a change in their political leadership. Entire families came with only what they could fit in a small bag. Several of our church families opened their homes, some with little room to spare.

Such gracious hospitality echoes God’s command to the Israelites before they inhabited the promised land. As an agricultural society, they understood the importance of the harvest. Every bit of food would be essential to get them through until next year’s harvest. God told the Israelites when harvesting not to go back to retrieve what they may have missed. “Leave it for the foreigner, the fatherless and the widow” (Deuteronomy 24:19). They were to practice generosity not by giving when they knew they had enough but by giving out of a heart of trusting in God’s provision “so that the Lord [their] God may bless [them] in all the work of their hands” (v. 19). God always has enough. (Matt Lucas, Our Daily Bread, 8th December 2025)

The law in Deuteronomy for the Israelites not to go back and glean the harvest but to leave the leftovers to the foreigner, widows and orphans is one of more intriguing aspects I learnt from the Lord these past few years. It is through my morning devotional preparations that I learnt of this and I have not ceased to be amazed ever since.

It goes to show where our LORD God’s heart is and it is something we need to emulate when dealing with people in general. Unfortunately, the Israelites didn’t practice this law religiously as much as they didn’t adhere to the Mosaic law most of the time as can be seen during the reigns of their kings, most of whom rebelled against God whether in Judah or Northern Israel. This was amongst the reasons why the LORD allowed them to be exiled by the Assyrians and then by the Babylonians.

In the world, we are conditioned “not to leave anything on the table” when negotiating. This means we extract as much as we can from the other side. Similarly, we bargain for as low a price as possible when procuring. Process efficiency means we have zero tolerance for wastage or leakage. In fact, auditors conduct exercises to test for revenue leakages in businesses. That is why although RM1,000 may mean much less to a very wealthy person, like a multimillionaire, it is surprisingly painful for such a person to give it away.

As a Christian, however, in our own affairs, we need to practice generosity in giving to God, His causes or in just helping those in need. It is indeed a tragedy of the faith if we have RM100 million and yet find it hard to give away RM10,000 although we have less issue buying a car worth RM500,000 or more for ourselves.

In fact, we are to practice generosity not by giving when we know we had enough but by giving out of a heart of trusting in God’s provision “so that the Lord God may bless us in all the work of our hands”. God always has enough! We give willingly because we trust God! Amen!

Have a good week ahead, everyone! As we usher in the spirit of love, compassion and generosity this Christmas season!

Walking the “wrong” way

https://odb.org/2025/12/05/the-power-of-influence-3

Galatians 5:7–10 (NIV): 7 You were running a good race. Who cut in on you to keep you from obeying the truth? 8 That kind of persuasion does not come from the one who calls you. 9 “A little yeast works through the whole batch of dough.” 10 I am confident in the Lord that you will take no other view. The one who is throwing you into confusion, whoever that may be, will have to pay the penalty.

It was Tuesday at the gym, so the people walking around the track were supposed to go clockwise. The first walkers my wife joined were doing that. But then another person walked onto the track going counterclockwise. A couple of her friends joined her—and then another. Suddenly there was chaos on the track—and it took a few minutes to restore order.

While the wrong-way walkers intended no harm, I couldn’t help but think about the power of influence. One person headed the wrong way leads to another, and on it goes. It’s a bit like Proverbs 13:20: “Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” Following a person going the wrong way leads to trouble. (Dave Branon, Our Daily Bread 5th December 2025)

There is an aspect of going the wrong way that we should be careful in these end times. Not so much wrong teachings although that would well lead us astray. The point I like to highlight this morning is how strong we want to hold on to a certain belief or spiritual principle. For a simpler example, in the area of divine healing, there were teachings that focussed on our faith such that our faith must be strong and unwavering to the extent of excluding medical treatment. It is like if you do not go for medical treatment, you are telling God that you are 100% dependent on Him and vice versa. In a way, it’s an appealing principle because the LORD does expect us to totally depend on Him. But the flaw in that principle is that we are sort of putting God in a spot – heal me or I die. A bit like the temptation of the devil to Jesus to jump down from the top of the Temple. Always remember that medical science is part of the natural world.

The overriding spiritual principle remains that as much as healing is real, it is still at the grace of God and that means it is discretionary and not compulsory on the part of God. We should all know by now that we cannot “force” God into anything as He is always sovereign in how He responds and His timing is always His choice. Of course at the other extreme is to be dismissive of healing and to only have unbelief cloud our hearts that we completely miss out on the supernatural side of our relationship with God.

If we find ourselves being too dogmatic or taking unconventional or radical views over certain things especially on spiritual matters, we need to check ourselves and pray that the Lord will enlighten us to see if we are going the wrong way. Some views if taken to the extreme may have irreversible and even fatal consequences. Not all unconventional ways are wrong but in most cases, it is better to follow the crowd walking clockwise, rather than walk the wrong way, anti-clockwise. The crowd is not always right though. So it still boils down to how well we know our God and our Lord Jesus Christ.

Believing in things unseen

https://odb.org/2025/12/04/believing-more-than-we-see

Hebrews 11:1–4 (NIV): 11 Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see. 2 This is what the ancients were commended for.
3 By faith we understand that the universe was formed at God’s command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible.
4 By faith Abel brought God a better offering than Cain did. By faith he was commended as righteous, when God spoke well of his offerings. And by faith Abel still speaks, even though he is dead.

In the late nineteenth century, few people had access to the great sequoia groves, and many didn’t believe the reports of the massive trees. In 1892, however, four lumberjacks ventured into the Big Stump Forest in California and spent thirteen days felling Mark Twain. Twain was 1,341 years old, three hundred feet tall, and fifty feet in circumference. They shipped part of this remarkable beauty to the American Museum of Natural History, where everyone could see a sequoia.

The reality, though, is that we can’t prove every truth with our eyes alone. Hebrews describes faith as “confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see” (Hebrews 11:1). Faith isn’t irrational or a fit of fancy, because the whole story is grounded in a person—Jesus—who has entered human history. Faith includes human senses and reason, but it’s not limited to them. Faith requires more. “By faith we understand that the universe was formed at God’s command,” Hebrews says, “so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible” (v. 3). (Winn Collier, Our Daily Bread, 4th December 2025).

Faith is to believe in things unseen and yet it is not irrational, in the sense that it is still grounded on facts and logic. That is why faith also requires the use of the mind to understand the tenets of the faith. That is also why many spent years just studying the various aspects of our faith, especially the Word of God and Jesus Christ as the Word and Christ form the foundation of our faith. Paul uses the phrase that we may increase in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ because the more we know Him and of Him, the more mature we become in our spiritual life.

Thus as much as we believe in miracles and faith healing, we still abide by our doctor’s instructions. The latter may not have the perfect cure but it is backed by years of knowledge pioneered by those in medical research. Yet God can still heal in the midst of treatment. It is wrong to say that if we take the medical route that we do not have faith for God to heal us. For example, while Covid vaccines had not gone through vigorous testings and thus may lead to unknown consequences, they were still necessary to save millions of lives as medical infrastructure was not able to cope when thousands and thousands require respitory assistance. Without vaccines, Covid patients die within days when the virus attacked their lungs and incapacitated their natural ability to breathe.

Our faith is based on the LORD God that we can’t see. Our Saviour who was God incarnate, the Immanuel, walked the earth 2,000 years ago and there are infinitely more who believed in Him who did not see Him in the flesh compared to those who did. Yet millions over the ages gave their lives and many died and sacrificed their lives for His name’s sake.

We are who we are in the faith because we believe in the hope that Christ will return one day in full glory and power (it should be soon) and we will have life eternal in the new heaven and new earth, where God will once again dwell amongst His people but in tangible form. One day, not now, the things unseen will be seen. Until then, it requires faith to believe and hope.

Growth through pain

https://odb.org/2025/12/03/growth-through-pain

Psalm 119:65–72 (NIV): 65 Do good to your servant according to your word, LORD.
66 Teach me knowledge and good judgment, for I trust your commands.
67 Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I obey your word. 68 You are good, and what you do is good; teach me your decrees. 69 Though the arrogant have smeared me with lies, I keep your precepts with all my heart. 70 Their hearts are callous and unfeeling, but I delight in your law. 71 It was good for me to be afflicted so that I might learn your decrees. 72 The law from your mouth is more precious to me than thousands of pieces of silver and gold.

The brain is remarkably small, but stress can make it even smaller. Recent research has revealed that cumulative stress can shrink the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for managing emotions, impulses, and social interactions. This shrinkage is linked to anxiety and depression, highlighting the toll that a lifetime of stress can take. But there’s good news—the brain’s plasticity allows it to heal through intentional practices like exercise, meditation, and meaningful relationships.

Like our brains, our spirits are capable of being stretched. God uses this stretching to cause growth and renewal. Through Scripture, prayer, and a Spirit-inspired perspective, He can reverse the effects of our hardships. He can use our afflictions for our spiritual growth, transforming pain into purpose. (Marvin Williams, Our Daily Bread, 3rd December 2025)

While in the natural stress may be harmful to the brain in the long run, stress also induces growth in our intellectual abilities in the sense that more of our brain’s capacity is utilised. Thus, as we study and work hard, we get better at the things we do. That is why for a young graduate, we always emphasise exposure is more crucial compared to monetary returns. It is much better to earn lesser a bit doing more, than earning more doing nothing much. Even at the end of our working life, the debate is whether to continue working or retire completely and do nothing as sone say idleness may well shorten our life. Perhaps people without a sense of purpose drift away and die younger.

But in the spiritual realm, the principle is clear. The more we go through for God and Christ, the more we will grow in our faith, our knowledge of Jesus Christ and in our spiritual maturity. This is because suffering produces perseverance and perseverance produces character and character produces hope as per Romans 5:3-5. We should follow the LORD’s exaltation for Joshua – “be strong and courageous for I am with you wherever you go.” Face life courageously with a strong faith despite the struggles and the hardships. Look at the unseen things in life as that is faith, for the seen is temporal while the unseen is eternal.

Have a great day ahead today! Remember, it is through the hardships in life as we face them courageously with faith grounded in Christ that we will grow spiritually and fulfil God’s plans and purposes for our lives. Take care, everyone and God bless us all in all that we do!

A gentle answer

https://odb.org/2025/12/02/positive-graffiti

Proverbs 15:1–4 (NIV): A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. 2 The tongue of the wise adorns knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly. 3 The eyes of the Lord are everywhere, keeping watch on the wicked and the good. 4 The soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit.

As a young man, journalist Sebastian Junger traveled the United States and wrote about it. One day in the 1980s, he entered a restroom in the Florida Keys and found hateful graffiti scrawled on the walls. Most of it targeted Cuban immigrants. But one message, apparently from a Cuban, stood out. It read, “Thank God the rest of the people in this country are warm and caring and welcomed me in ’62.” Junger observed, “The very worst things about America were on that men’s-room wall, and the very best.” (Tim Gustafson, Our Daily Bread 2 December 2025)

As a believer, the words that come from us whether verbally or in writing, in person or from the pulpit, should be comforting and encouraging. As Proverbs advises in 15:1 – a gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. I guess there are times when we are unable to avoid harsh words, maybe because we were overcome by emotions or anger. But as part of our Christian character development, we should always aim to be calm and steady even when provoked, Jesus being the perfect example of calmness.

The strange and ironical thing is that our harsher words are usually directed to those closest to us like our spouse, children and siblings. That’s tragic because they are the ones we love the most and more importantly, who love us the most. It’s a pattern we need to break if that’s the norm. Exercise restraint whether at home or outside. Be patient. Usually the difficult moment will pass and things will settle down. Refrain from the temptation to inflict harm as harsh words can cause long-term ramifications and people seldom forget such words. Even words uttered in jest but are insensitive will be remembered for a long time with lasting damage. Proverbs 15:4 – The soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit. Surely as fellow believers, we do not want to crush the spirit of a another believer, especially a young one.

Allow the Lord to work in our lives to soften our hearts to listen and obey His voice and ask Him to help us exercise restraint and patience in our choice of words even when we ourselves are confronted by harsh words.